I’ve seen big girls kill their little girls because they thought it’d make them bigger.

And then their hearts shrink correspondingly.

I’ve seen boys get crushed under the weight of their own toys.

I’ve seen everyone I’ve ever known at times lose their cool over a blender.

I’ve seen books on toxicology, but stubborn me, I’ve passed them by.

I’ve seen lepers become heroes inside of Wal-Mart shopping carts.

I’ve seen babies catapulted through time and space, land, get up, and become fully-functional, minimum-wage workers.

I’ve seen mellow murderers take on the features of their elderly victims.

I’ve seen those victims take on the form of green planetary ooze.

I’ve seen black holes I may or may not have had something to do with (no really, I myself don't know).

I’ve seen people beat up just for living on some old high school shit.

I’ve seen busty college grads smoke the good stuff, hallucinate, and turn to elves.

I’ve seen mammoth barbarians cry over a teaspoon of heroin.

I’ve seen armies of ants and roaches parade away my last hotdog bun.

I’ve seen life suck the fun right out of the party.

And been blamed and never invited back.

I’ve seen singers forget lyrics; their faces freeze and readjust.

I’ve seen men in ski masks scream for me to come outside.

I’ve seen other cars smash through my windshield and thought: man, this movie stinks.

I’ve seen burning toy stores and felt the tears of a thousand children burning in my liver.

I’ve seen poison bubbles and held my breath as not to pop them.

I’ve seen man-eating sharks trapped in goldfish bowls.

I’ve seen near microscopic crumbs of love hurling through very real tornadoes.

I’ve seen the gorgeous go ugly because they couldn’t find their make-up cases.

I’ve seen women fucked while they were unconscious.

And I’ve seen women fucked unconscious.

I’ve seen bad, bad hospitals the exact size and specifications of my fist.

I’ve seen the other side of Oz, and the overpriced ticket stubs of a forgotten Disneyland.

I’ve seen random rabbits appear mysteriously when I needed a sign.

I’ve seen more ideas fail than seems possible.

And I’ve seen a whole lot of seeming that I now know never happened.

I’ve seen new-to-that-school boys get rubber bands snapped in their faces repeatedly by an entire classroom and the chickenshit teacher go on teaching her “lessons”.

I’ve seen a democratic friend shake so hard she’s left stains on the floor.

I’ve cleaned those stains, if only in my mind.

I’ve seen dudes mainline raw sewage because their mothers told them no.

Or once upon a time their fathers didn’t care.

I’ve seen a thousand stupid fads die like the pet rock and sea monkeys.

I’ve seen suckers gas themselves over the tiniest of tiny time-things.

I’ve seen creatures without names or fingerprints, the odd alien with a human heart.

I’ve seen both men and women faint out of sheer anger or heartbreak.

I’ve seen a lot of things I couldn’t afford.

I’ve seen the dawn.

I’ve seen the silence take on so many forms it’s made my soul blur.

I’ve seen myself bite on beautiful shoulders and slice open my brother’s lips.

I’ve seen a falling and then a falling and then a falling I could never explain here or anywhere else, not in a trillion light years.

I’ve seen the insides of outer space.


  1. hi peter schwartz, i love this.

    i blacked out from heartbreak and i couldn't fucking believe it. could not fucking believe it.

  2. So you think you can tell Blue skies from Pain
    heaven from hell

  3. Candid Camera Poparazi with all those Lenses just cannot See. All the Lives Who are Afflicted
    with Fame and Fortune are Addicted. Candid Camera
    Poparazi With All Those EYES STILL COULD NOT SEE.