INTERVIEW W / CHLOE CALDWELL. SLEEP.SNORT.FUCK.

I really loved doing this interview because I got to chat with Chloe while she was answering the questions, so we got to exchange little insights, and she even asked me some of my own questions. And I'm sure my nerdy responses freaked her out, like fuck, this guy's a dork. But yeah, I first came across Chloe (see how I did that... nice), when she volunteered to be a guest blogger. READ HER POST HERE. And what she said was pretty amazing and heartbreaking and endearing so I read everything of hers I could find and I loved it and you will too if you read her shit. So after you're done reading this, CLICK HERE. Here's the interview:

BG: so many quality indie presses / literary journals, what is SLEEP.SNORT.FUCK. bringing to the table? what words of wisdom can it offer to the literary conversation?
CC: Sleep.Snort.Fuck. is a place for verbal diarrhea. I want it to be a therapeutic place for writers. You can be vulgar. You can be emotional and personal and high when you write it. It can be a journal entry. SSF is a place to connect. You don't have to be embarrassed. You can play around with writing styles. In fact: Please do play around with writing styles. You can give too much information. Why hide anything? We are all going to die. And may I just put it out there that I absolutely hate the expression TMI. So, in a nutshell, SSF is the opposite of TMI.

BG: when the world ends in 2012, as the mayans predicted, and the next species takes over the earth and digs up America 1,000 years from now, what literary journals / indie press publications will they be restoring, reviving, and immortalizing, and why?
CC: None, they will be dead. I am a realist. R.I.P. Lit Zines. R.I.P. S.S.F.

BG: what is the last book you borrowed and never returned? who'd you steal it from and why didn't you give it back?

This is a broad subject for me, as I am obsessed with other people's things. I have Prozac Nation from the last guy I dated. Never read it. Never returned it because I haven't seen him since. Also borrowed as of today: The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone. The Ab Diet. What Happy Women Know. The Highly Sensitive Person In Love. When Things Fall Apart, These have all been borrowed by people that I work for. Is it obvious I love self-help books? Damn. The library tells me I have a copy of When You Are Engulfed In Flames by David Sedaris and that I owe them forty dollars but I cannot find it. I could write a full piece on all of the books I own that are not mine. I will not bore you with it. But once I took my brother's copy of Ginsberg's HOWL and collaged it with letters and pictures of a guy I loved. And I am constantly giving books away that are not mine to men I love. Bukowski and Fante books mostly. Guilty habit. I feel better now that I said it though. And now no one reading this will ever lend me a book. That's okay.

BG: name the five best books you've read that you'd bet your ass nobody else has?
CC: The Ultimate Sex Test by SMITH and DOE is extraordinary. My friend out here got it at Value Village and gave it to me. The best chapter is called 'How to determine whether or not your man privately feels that your vagina is revolting.' There is an actual math equation in there.

Bullshit Rodeo by Misti Rainwater Lites is one of the best creative non-fiction works out there. Seriously. Bullshit Rodeo is off the fucking chain. One of my many favorite paragraphs:

"I wanted to give him eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. But I think he wanted eternal moonlight of the scrawled mind, like me. That is one thing I think we have in common. It tortures us but we like to remember where we’ve been and whom we’ve loved. We wear our hearts’gaudy mistakes like wine stains and wave away offers of lemon juice or bleach."

Elaine's Black Gigolo is a book I bought at The Strand off of the dollar carts and it was pretty entertaining.

The Ethical Slut is eye opening for people that enjoy sex and don't always have run of the mill relationships. It's very straightfoward and talks about things that a lot of people think are taboo, which I appreciate.

Oh and god, I love Aaron Cometbus. I really do. The book Despite Everything, is a compilation of twenty years of his punk zine that he started in Berkely, CA. He is so inspiring and such a great read while drinking coffee.

And I am going to sneak one more in here, another book off of the dollar carts: Notes To Myself by Hugh Prather.

Oh, and Everything Was Fine Until Whatever by Chelsea Martin is one of the most dynamic things I have read in years.

BG: who is your favorite historical figure, past or present, and how have they influenced your literary journey?

CC: I don't know, dude. The Rum Diary by Hunter S. Thompson did a number on me. As did every Judy Blume and Lois Lowry book. As did every Bukowski book. But Judy Blume made me feel less alone, before I knew what feeling alone even felt like. And that is what I would like do do for people. So I choose her.

BG: BONUS QUESTION: Give us a six song playlist that tells the story of your life.

CC: Gypsy by Fleetwood Mac. Duh.

And, not to go, like, totally Lilith Fair on you, but Martha Wainwright's Bloody Motherfucking Asshole, because I like this one lyric about wanting to be a man: Oh I wish I wish I wish I was born a man, so I could learn how to stand up for myself, like those guys with guitars, I've been watching in bars..

I also like how she begins with: Poetry is no place for a heart that's a whore.

I have always felt a kinship for Martha, like my heart always went out to her, because she has a brother that is a genius at everything and she is "okay." I have some sort of hang up about that myself.

Fireworks by Animal Collective has been my prozac for a few years now.

Amity by Elliott Smith because two important people in my life have told me that they think of me when they hear that song and also I like when he says, "Hello Hello Kitty Happy in New York City" because I always heard it as: "Hello Hello Can you be happy in New York City?" And I always wondered to myself, can I? Can I be happy in New York City?

Old Man by Neil Young because I want to dance with my father to that song at the wedding I will have one day.

Tower Of Song by Leonard Cohen. Because Leonard Cohen just has the best words sometimes.